When God Answers, “No”

If you’ve prayed much at all, you know that God sometimes answers, “No,” to your prayers. In our despair, we try to figure out why we didn’t get the answer we wanted. What if I hadn’t acted so poorly last week? What if I hadn’t done that? Maybe, if I had more faith God would have said “yes.”

2 Corinthians 12 tells us that we’re in good company when God doesn’t answer our prayers in the way we want. The Apostle Paul relays how “a thorn was given me in the flesh” (v. 7), and then he goes on to explain how he responded to this hardship: “Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me” (v. 8). Paul describes theses prayers as pleading with the Lord. This isn’t a polite request, but he’s begging, even imploring, God to take away this thorn. This wasn’t a one time thing, but three times, he entreated God for relief.

But the Lord said, “No.” Rather than giving Paul what he begged for, our Lord Jesus told him, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (v. 9). Why didn’t Paul get that for which he prayed? Was he rebelling against God? Did he not have enough faith? Was he in sin? Scripture doesn’t point to any of those things. Instead, Paul observes that God had something better for him. His weakness grew him in humility (v. 7), and this weakness became a way for him to experience the power of Christ to an even greater extent (v. 10).

On the night before his death, Jesus himself heard “no” in response to his prayer to God the Father. He had asked, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me” (Lk 22:42). He prayed that there might be another way for our redemption, and like with Paul’s prayer above, this was a pleading. Luke records, “And being in agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground” (22:44). He prayed so fervently that he began to sweat his own blood. Yet, even as he beseeched his Father, he submitted to him: “Nevertheless, not my will but yours be done” (22:42).

Here is the Son of God who had lived in perfect communion with his Father from eternity past. They share a single will—they’ve always worked for the same thing. They’ve lived in the perfect unity of their love. But here in his greatest hour of need, Jesus hears “no” for the first time from our heavenly Father.

But because he heard “no,” we have confidence that our heavenly Father hears us when we pray. He hears all of those who have trusted in Jesus because now through Jesus we’ve been adopted as God’s sons and daughters. When we pray, our heavenly Father hears us like he hears Jesus. By faith we are united to Christ and filled with his Holy Spirit, who is the Spirit of adoption, so that we can cry out to God as our faith (Rom 8:15-17).

Now when we pray as God’s children by grace, we can share in Jesus’s confidence that God hears our prayers. As he stood before Lazaarus’s tomb, Jesus prayed, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. I knew that you always hear me” (John 11:41-42). Not only does God hear our prayers, but he answers them as a good and loving Father, providing all that we need (Lk 11:11-13).